CharDawn fic "What If" (Chapter 1. His Queries)

12:40 AM. January 7, 2013.

Richard was on the couch resting his feet on the other chair. Their lanai has been his haven for days now.  He sipped his coffee much to his delight that it was already cold. He raised his hands and rested it behind his head, tilting it beneath the midnight sky.

Ano ba tong nangyayari sakin? He couldn’t help but ask himself.

He looked at his watch. 12:45 AM, it says.

He was about to take another sip of his coffee when his phone rang. He picked it up and smiled when he saw who the caller was.

“Hon…” he said half smiling.

“Hon, I watched GGV kanina.” It was Lucy. Her voice was so serene and it made him smile a bit more.

“So how was it, alam mo ba I wasn’t able to catch it?” liar. He wanted to slap himself.

“I was literally, laughing the whole time. Vice is such a comic. You and Dawn were so game. I must say kinaya mong buhatin yong isang fan. It was really hilarious. That was the highlight. Bakit hindi ka pala nanood?”

Of course she was talking about the famous, “I-Dawn Zulueta moko” antic.

“Tinabihan ko kasi si Juliana pinatulog ko ng maaga kasi baka ma late sa school bukas.” He proudly tells his wife, which is true by the way.

“Eh, naka idlip din pala ako, pag bukas ko ng TV tapos na.” He said as-a-matter-of-factly trying to conceal his hesitation. Truth is, after putting Juliana to sleep he went to his office to watch.

“Ganun ba sayang, you should have seen yourself, Hon. It was so amusing.” Lucy tells him giddily.

I should have seen myself smiling like crazy. I should have seen how awkward I was on some points. I should have seen myself blushing like a teenager. I should have seen the spark. That it’s still there. That it never went away.

Of course I saw that. I was watching the whole time.

His mind was racing. For a moment he was speechless. He didn’t know what to say.

“Hon? Still there? Inaantok ka na siguro.” it almost made him jump.

“Yes Hon, I’m here, I’m sorry.” He faked a yawn.

“Aw you must be really tired, okay you get some sleep na Honey, I hope you kissed Juliana goodnight for me. I love you Honey.” Lucy then cooed a kissing sound that sounded “mwah.”

“I love you more, Honey.”

“Have a good sleep.” Lucy added.

“You too, and Hon?”

“Yes?”

“When will you be home?” he asked.

“Honey, diba ikaw ang nag book ng ticket ko online, thought you should know it firsthand.” He can tell that Lucy’s smiling while saying that.

“Naglalambing lang… alam ko naman na sa Wednesday pa.” he said pouting his lips.

“Honey, you’re really a charmer. I miss you.” Lucy has always been so sweet.

“Ngayon ikaw naman naglalambing… sige na tulog ka na din I know maaga ka pa mamaya. I love you.” He said.

“And I love you too, Honey.”

He put his phone down.

He took a deep breath. He shook his head in disbelief.

Bakit ba kasi ako ganito? Nanood naman ako pero bakit gumawa pa ako ng kwento na hindi ako nanood? Wala namang problema dun kasi kahit nga asawa ko nanood din. At pasalamat nga dapat ako kasi may parts na nai.cut. I wonder if she’ll ever see the whole of it.

Then it came across his mind.

Dawn.

For a moment he wondered what she’s doing right now. How was she feeling right then? Did she ever watch it? Or did they watch it? Together?

He took out his phone, his fingers scribbled back and forth until it stopped to a certain person in his contact list. Dawn Lagdameo.

For a moment, he stopped, thinking slowly as if trying to process everything.

O? Ano tatawag ka ganitong oras? Magtatanong kung nanood siya? Tapos kasi wala lang, gusto mo lang mag tanong?  Foul.

He put his phone to his pocket and went upstairs. Seemingly avoidant as to what could have been the answers to his questions.

Itulog mo na nga kung ano man yan. He told himself trying to make it calm.